On Leaving it All

                A bit more than twenty years ago, my children, my husband and I moved out to a profoundly rural area.  When we arrived, there were no restaurants, no pizza, no Chinese food, no internet, and often no police.  We traded suburban life with all of its woes and temporary advantages to one with almost limitless space, where our kids could raise livestock, chase their chickens, truly explore hobbies, hike, and grow up with fewer distractions.

              Our experiment worked.  Our homeschooled kids were academically quite successful, and went on to college, and universities and were successful in the careers they chose. One of our children passed away, the result of a cardiac arrhythmic syndrome which had not been identified, and took his life one morning, this time of year, about eleven years ago.

               In a sense as a tribute to the son who passed, we continued to live here. We needed to provide an excellent home to the animals our son had known.  As if keeping a promise to him, we kept the homestead fairly similar to how it had been during his time here.

               I can't help but notice that in the past few months, four families who were decidedly cornerstones to this area, have placed their homes or farms for sale.  I tell myself that this is natural. Not everyone wishes to age in place. Some return to towns and cities in old age for ease of getting to the doctor or the pharmacy, at least.  And yet, I am saddened to see these families leave. Some of them have been in the area longer than we have. Their departure will make our family the old timers in the area. This means we cannot avoid the realization that we all age, and that eventually, we will either depart from this area, or die here.

              If I were to be honest, I would say that although I dislike the idea of dying in this place, I like the idea of leaving it all by choice even less.  



 

How Time Passes

             If I were to be honest, I would have to tell you that I am absolutely in awe of how quickly time passes. I still remember Durk Pearson and Sandy Shaw, who hold multiple Phds, and their discussions of life extension on the Merv Griffin Show when I was a teen. I followed some of their recommendations, and I must say, it has worked in terms of keeping me fairly healthy, energetic and youthful. It has not slowed the passage of time though.

            In the early 1980s, before I left NJ, I was a young RN and I made many friends at what is now the Robert Woods Johnson Medical Center, which is also the teaching hospital of Rutgers Medical School.  I had many friends who came from all over the world, both men and women who had come to do a fellowship or a residency. What I remember most is their senses of humor. So many of them were very funny and this kept me on my toes.

            This week I learned that one of my dear friends from those days has died. Without naming him, I would like to say he was one of the kindest people to both his patients and to all the staff. He loved nice cars and I remember well his Lotus Elite.  His obituary said that the love of his life had been his young grandchildren.

              How does this happen ?  Yes, I moved away, married, had five children, developed several careers, built a couple of farms, sent children to college and stood in awe as they graduated and built homes or businesses, but I have just gotten started. I have just cleared my schedule enough to be able to achieve some of the things I really want to do.

             How can it be that some of the kindest and funniest friends I have known have been called home already ?   Perhaps it is no longer time to be patient. Perhaps it's time to achieve the things we wish to, while we still can.  By the way, my friend, if you are reading my post from the great beyond, I have only one grandson, and I quite agree with you on how wonderful they are.